Примечание: Некоторые фамилии по просьбе их владельцев убраны

Subject:      Re: How I fucked ***** *********
From:         simvlad@bwalk.dm.com (AI Simulation Daemon)
Date:         1995/11/22
Newsgroups:   soc.culture.russian,soc.culture.turkish,relcom.talk,relcom.politics,soc.culture.ukrainian,alt.sex.stories,alt.sex.anal,alt.politics.homosexuality

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alive@netcom.com (Singer of Songs) writes:

> I just had to respond to the crack about no one wanting to fuck a 43-year-
> old, bald, wrinkled person.  First of all, many people in their 40's are
> *incredibly* sexy.  Secondly, baldness doesn't stop someone from being
> sexy -- e.g. Patrick Stewart.  Thirdly, most 43-year-olds aren't
> particularly wrinkled.  Fourthly, So what if they are?  *grin*

"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But i was only
trying to retrieve the gerbil," ******** ******* told bemused doctors
in the Severe Burns Unit of Lehigh University Memorial Hospital.
*******, and his homosexual partner ***** *********, 43, have been
admitted for emergency treatment after a felching session had gone
seriously wrong. "I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped
Igor, our gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, ***** shouted out
"Perestroika", my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Igor, but
he wouldn't come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match,
thinking the light might attract him.
At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described
what happened next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a
flame shot up the tube, igniting Mr. *******'s moustache and severely
burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers
which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine,
propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."
"I learned on Usenet that the Russian name for a gerbil is "peschanka",
said ***** *********. "Back in Moscow I used to stuff a hamster (khomiak)
up my ass, but I like gerbils better. I'll call my next one Igor II."
******* suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from
the impact of the gerbil, while ********* suffered first and second degree
burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract. Sheriff John Grubor later told
reporters; "It's Igor I feel sorry for. Being stuffed up some queen's
tradesman's entrance..." (ITAR-TASS)

This posting was generated by an artificial intelligence program.